Thursday, August 14, 2008

Mental Programming and Relationships, Part 2 of 2

Do you think love is difficult? Think AGAIN. “Open your eyes” (yes, I did steal that line from Vanilla Sky). Look around you – have you noticed that everyone around you is hooked up, and in love and having babies? Do you think that the rest of the world is magically lucky in love and you’re unlucky? Give me a break! The reality is that we all share something in common in the world and that is we all want to love and be loved. It is our nature as human beings. So if we all have this in common, why believe for a second that it is some impossible feat. If it were, there would rarely be marriages, and I would not see so many happy couples everywhere.

So before you blame the “outside” on your difficulties in the area of love, take a look on the inside. When I took a closer look at myself, here are some of the horrendous things that I had buried in my sub-conscious as pertained to relationships and love:

-I would be secretly happy when I would hear people were breaking-up because something inside me felt that people were better off single

-For some crazy reason I began to believe I was better off alone. I used to say things like this to my friends and never even realized it!

-When my parents would ask me if I was ever going to get married, I used to tell them that I never wanted to get married and that I liked living alone too much

-I used to pursue unavailable women

-When girls wanted to be involved in my life, I would push them away and never wanted them to change their life plans for me since I believed that everyone should be “free”

-Relationships were supposed to be temporary

- In my last relationship I engaged in very atypical and bizarre behavior – I remember once thinking to myself while trying to provoke a fight “I don’t need you, I don’t need anyone!!!”

Yes, I am insane. No, I have not seen a psychiatrist…yet. Understand, I had no realization that I was thinking these things, as strange as it sounds. But the truth is, I never took a step back and realized how skewed my thinking had become over the years. I strongly urge you to take time off from actively thinking and monitor your passive thoughts as it could very well be that you also have such ‘limiting beliefs’ about love which are holding you back. Similarly, if your relationships are fine and you always have money problems, take a step back and ask yourself what are your beliefs about money. The world is your oyster and if something is holding you back from achieving a conscious desire, more often than not, it is a limiting subconscious belief.

It’s never too late to change your thinking and reprogram your mind. You may be shocked about how contradictory your beliefs are compared to your desires, but don’t blame yourself – we are all programmed in some way or another. This same programming which may have been sabotaging relationships can equally make amazing ones for you. The first step starts with you – are you willing to take it?

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