Saturday, August 9, 2008

Book Review: MEN WHO CAN'T LOVE, by Steven Carter & Julia Sokol

I've often heard people say that their "jaw hit the floor" while reading a book, and always thought that this was a rather exaggerated description of a reaction to something. But, for the first time in my life I have to eat my words - while reading this book from front to back, my jaw was literally dropped open, laying on the floor.

Wow. For any guy out there who wonders why he can't find "the one", or any girl out there wondering why her guy acts weird or somewhat psychopathic, this book is a MUST READ, and that's not something I say very often.

This book is filled with real stories of the thought processes of guys and why they run away from great relationships, behave irrationally and make the girl's like a living hell. According to this book, there is a new discovery called commitment-phobia which basically makes many guys (and some women as well), act crazy the more serious the relationship gets. Basically, we are afraid of commitment so this triggers a phobic reaction within us. We look to start fights for no reason, disappear for days at a time, cheat on the girl hoping she'll find out and even resent her for loving us!

Crazy as it sounds, like I said, my jaw was dragging on the floor as the crazy thought processes and things I did matched the stories of these other guys perfectly. It was embarassing to read at times. As I remember my last relationship which ended when she had enough of my craziness, I wondered why was I having such an allergic reaction to someone who was treating me so well?

This book is a quick and fun read. It's written in simple, down to earth language and for any of you that have been through this whether you were on the giving or receiving end, this book will definitely be an eye-opener. In fact, I recommend this book to those people out there who wonder why they can't have a good relationship - it could be you are either suffering from the same thing or subconsciously attracting these same types of people into your life.

I'm glad this book came out - it made me feel less crazy to tell you the truth. To learn that it is not so uncommon for people to act like this gave me some hope! Hope that I can now use to heal myself and move forward in this wonderful thing called life.


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Old Couples said...

I read that book, and I love it, it's my favorite.

Anonymous said...

I bought this book and I couldn't put it down. I read it front to back in less then 24hrs. I laughed and cried. I was with a man for three years who is everything this book describes. I had so many answers and this book made me come to the realization of who I was dealing with. I cried because it touched me in so many ways I can't explain and I laughed because I felt like this book was a study of my relationship. I would recommend this book to anyone. I would especially recommend this book to the man who is all these things the book talks about to give them in site on what they are doing.